Christian: The son becomes the father, the father (becomes) the son.
Bondage: Ah, the bible!
Christian: Superman.

Party Host: You have two choices. You can either quiet down or get the fuck out of here.
Bond: I'm getting the fuck out of here.

I could learn to be a dentist in like a month. (Bond)

Resurrection!

Heroes Will Die. Worlds Will Be Born.

Matt: "You never start being a woman. You go straight from being a chick to being a cougar."

(Lorene, the Ceramics professor, decided to give out shiny star stickers after we cleaned the studio. Her husband was in her office.)

Lorene (walking to her office): "I'm going to stick one on his butt, and he won't even notice!" (a few seconds pass, then she returns) "The moment I touched him, he said, 'Take that off, you idiot!'"

"A boyfriend is just like a goalie. You can still score!"
(Paedae)

"A Spectacle Raptor? It looks a lot like you, but with a gun."

(Emily, to me)

"Actually that would be really good, pussy and vanilla ice cream...
No wait, pussy and peach ice cream!"
(Paedae)

"Every juice that comes out of a vegetarian is delicious."
(Paedae)

Paedae: "When we're done, you guys are going to be sexual tyrannosauruses and human diamonds."
Matt: "Are you sure you don't mean sexual diamonds and human tyrannosauruses?"
Paedae: "YES, I'M SURE."

"Did you see that girl in there? I bet she has perfect nipples."
(Paedae)

Nathan: "So, which muscles are the obliques exactly?"
Paedae: "It's the 'V' that points to your dick!"

"I know Erin causes derangement in my genes!"

(Matt, during a conversation about cancer causes--instead of "genes," we heard "jeans")

"You don't masturbate much. Do you just have lots and lots of sex?"

(Random person in school dining facility)

"You rhymed your name with teriyaki. How is that not amazing?"
(James)

"That's not sweat. It's liquid love. ...Oh God, that's horrible. Please don't put this on the quote's blog."
(Russell)

Emily: "Mother of Jesus!"
Erin (from inside the bathroom): "You called?"

Guy 1: Women can't make art.
Guy 2: Hey! Dinner is art!

"did u just call blonds stupid?? that is just so racist..."
(idonnwanna of Youtube)